Childhood Encopresis Alliance
Supporting children, accompanying families.
Does your child wet themselves and not realize it? It's normal and there's an explanation
Although it may seem impossible and worrying for parents, when a child wets himself and doesn't feel it, it is more common than it seems and has a medical explanation. This happens due to encopresis, an intestinal disorder associated with chronic constipation.
What happens in the child's body?
When a child holds in stool for a long time, it builds up in the rectum, causing it to dilate and become progressively larger. Over time, the intestine becomes a reservoir for retained stool, and the nerves that should send signals to the brain stop working properly due to the constant pressure.
By losing sensitivity in the area, the child no longer feels the need to defecate and, without realizing it, may involuntarily leak loose or liquid stools. It is not that the child does not want to go to the bathroom, but rather that his body has stopped sending him the necessary signals to do so.
Many children with encopresis feel ashamed, insecure or guilty, which can affect their emotional well-being. So it's crucial to remember that they have no control over what happens to them. Their body has lost the ability to correctly perceive intestinal signals, so accidents are not intentional.
It is important to put anger or punishment aside and instead offer them a space of support and understanding. To do this, adults can:
Listen without judging, allowing them to express what they feel without fear.
Reinforce their self-esteem by reminding them that this problem does not define them.
Normalize the situation by speaking to them naturally and without causing shame.
Let them know that we are here to help them, with empathy and patience.
Be consistent and patient, as improvement takes time, but with support and the right habits, it is possible.
Parents' Guide: How to Support Your Child with Encopresis
Treating encopresis is a multi-step process, and parental support is essential to ensure that the child feels safe, understood, and supported throughout the entire process. Here are some guidelines on how to manage the situation at the family level, how to care for your child's emotional well-being, and how to work as a team to overcome encopresis.
Steps to help your child
1. Understand the condition and stay informed
It is critical for parents to understand that encopresis is not a voluntary behavior or an "accident" caused by laziness. It is a medical problem that is usually caused by chronic constipation, and children cannot always control their bowel movements.
Tip: Educate yourself about encopresis so you can better explain to your child what is happening. A good understanding of the condition will allow you to offer appropriate emotional support and avoid unnecessary frustration.
2. Emotional support: It's not the child's fault
Encopresis can cause embarrassment, anxiety and frustration for both the child and the parents. As a parent, your role is to create a supportive and loving environment where your child feels accepted and understood.
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Build trust: Make sure your child understands that he or she is not alone and that the situation is fixable. Avoid scolding or punishing; these actions will only increase anxiety and make recovery more difficult.
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Talk about encopresis openly: Addressing the topic in an open and understanding way helps reduce embarrassment. Explain in simple terms that encopresis is a condition that can be treated with patience.
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Be patient and consistent: Children may feel like they are failing when they are unable to control their bowel movements. Reinforce their achievements, however small, and celebrate their efforts. Patience and positive encouragement help reduce frustration.
Tip: A child who feels emotionally supported will be better able to work with you to overcome encopresis.
3. Stay calm and avoid pressure
The process of treating encopresis can be long, so it is vital to maintain a calm and consistent attitude. Anxiety or stress in parents can be transmitted to the child and make the process more difficult.
Avoid comparisons: Don't compare your child with other children who don't have this difficulty. Each child has his or her own pace of learning and improvement.
Avoid pressure: Don't make toileting or bowel movements a pressure issue. Avoid making your child feel like he is being "tested" or that he might disappoint you if he doesn't get his bowels under control right away.
Beware of emotional overload: Sometimes, parents can unintentionally generate more anxiety by talking about the situation repeatedly or constantly. While it is important to talk about encopresis, it is also important to offer an emotional respite, where the child can enjoy other relaxing activities.
Tip: Keep a balanced approach, being present without making your child feel like their progress is a source of additional stress.
4. Be an ally in the implementation of routines
Children with encopresis respond very well to routines. As a parent, your job is to help implement these routines into everyday life in a consistent, loving, and pressure-free way.
Establish consistent schedules: Make sure your child has a regular schedule for meals, bathing, and drinking. Regularity helps your child's body get used to certain patterns and helps prevent constipation.
Encourage healthy habits: Encourage your child to eat a healthy diet and drink plenty of water, which is essential to keep the bowel functioning well. Avoid foods that can make constipation worse.
Be flexible with routines: While consistency is key, it's also important to be flexible and patient when things don't go as planned. Not everything will be resolved immediately.
Tip: Parents who support their children in establishing habits, in a calm and consistent manner, achieve better results.
5. Manage expectations and seek support when you need it
Encopresis doesn't go away overnight. It's a process that can take time, and it's important for parents to manage expectations, staying calm when things don't improve as quickly as they'd like.
Don't set strict deadlines: Every child progresses at his or her own pace, and the process may take longer for some. It's important for parents not to get frustrated if there aren't immediate results. The approach should be gradual, and celebrating each small step is key.
Seek emotional support: If the process becomes especially challenging, don't hesitate to seek help. Sometimes, talking to other parents who have been through the same thing or consulting with a professional can be a big help.
Don't ignore the emotional aspects: If you feel that the situation is affecting your child or your family emotionally, it is important to seek help from a child psychologist or family support. The treatment of encopresis is not only physical, but also emotional.
Tip: Remember that patience, understanding and constant support will make a difference in the recovery process.
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Treating encopresis is a team effort, and you as a parent play a key role. Maintaining a positive attitude, supporting your child emotionally, and establishing consistent routines are key to helping them get through this stage. Remember that with patience, love, and dedication, encopresis is a condition that can be successfully treated.